where is God?

Where is God when bad things happen?

This question stirs such controversy
between the natural and the spiritual realms
and spirals thoughts
and faith
and belief.

How can I believe in a God who allows horror and injustice to transpire in my life?
My world?

The irony of these words
is that they spill from the mouths of those
who advocate for free will.
The freedom to make our own choices
and control our destinies.
For in forming these questions,
are we not backtracking
on our human desire
to be independent?
To cut the puppet strings?
To be free?


How is it that the freedom of choice
is a matter of personal convenience?
Yet when the impact of choice
penetrates the depths of our thought and soul,
our first glance casts blame at the heavens?
Looking for a cosmic correction
when the consequences of our choices
ripple with devastating affect
through our lives
and the lives of others?

In one breath we mock the idea
of a god that micro-manages the course of humanity,
and with the next breath
we demand a higher power
to mediate the moral compass of choice
between the dictator,
murderer,
pedophile,
drunk driver,
thief,
cheat,
as if certain decisions
or decision makers
warrant heavenly intervention.

Whenever I hear the question
"Where is God?
How could He allow this to happen..."

to the orphan?
to the widow?
to the hungry?
to the exploited?
to the oppressed?
to the broken?
to good people?

I hear the echo of His response...
"Where are you?
How could you?..."

oh my soul...

Ever have one of those days
where the weight of the world
seems to settle
in layers of silty indignation
in the depths of your heart?
Where even the sun,
awakening the world to spring,
cannot coax a soul into it's warmth?

The papers have been served
that will splinter my family
officially.
Legally.
Permanently.


and the faint murmurs of an ancient hymn
reach my heart...

O my soul,
why art thou grieving?
What disquiets and dismays?
Hope in God...

linger

Ever feel eaten alive by the rat race?
Consumed by the fast pace of schedules and commitments?
Our culture has been switched into fast forward
and it's all we can do to hold on.


We fast track school.
Food.
Correspondance.
Dating.
Research.
Information.
Friends.
Everything is at the touch of our fingers.
Portable.
Accelerated.
Efficient.

And the irony is that despite all the time we save,
we have no time...


The downfall of the convenience of expediacy is

we

no longer

know

how

to






wait.




In life.
In lines.
With our plans.
With people.
Relationships.
It's now or never.
And if it doesn't come in 5 minutes or less
we fidget.
We sigh.
We leave.

There is a beauty
that can only be found
when you linger.
When you choose to shut out everything
and stop
in a moment.
In space.
In time.
When you allow something
the time to develop.


Linger.
This was the word that came
in a moment of reflecting on God.
With God.
It came inconveniently,
in the pull of all I needed to accomplish
with the limits of time.
Isn't that always the case?
The wrestling of investing our time
in what we will lose
over what is eternally ours?
The temptation of unbalancing our priorities
in the favour of our "To Do" lists?

Linger.
It's invitation came quietly...

Don't rush to your schedule.
Don't rush through this song.
Linger.
Choose Me
over all you have to do
and all that overwhelms...
Your responsibilities.
Other's expectations.
Your meager efforts to try and hold things together.

Let Me meet you here.
Give Me time.
Time to heal.
Time to comfort.
Time to speak.
Time to move.
Time with you.

Good things come to those who wait.
Wait for Me.
Wait with Me.
Wait to see the plans and purposes I have for you
unfold.
My gifts come wrapped...

Linger.
Do not rush from My presence.
Allow it to work it's course in your spirit.
To renew.
Rebuild.
Restore.
To accomplish the infinitely more
that you hope for.
Be changed in it.
Be changed by it.

I will not beg.
I will not force.
The invitation is open.
The choice is yours.