Tuesday, April 05, 2005

April 5, 2005

So this is the beginning of my blog - an eternal legacy to a mind warped with thoughts and ideas for the world to see. So much to say - so much to let out...
I'm beginning a journey - an intentional time getting back to my roots. April 5, 1992 I started a much different journey...my spiritual journey. Through the death of a friend I realized I didn't have the control over my destiny as I had thought. God was bigger than my 13-year old brain had drawn Him up to be...and He was keenly interested and aware of my life.
Things have changed so much since then, and yet the underlying theme remains the same - God desires to have a relationship with me, and loves me so much He died for me. Can anyone really fathom that thought? That the God of the universe would lay His life down for a piddly creature? Like a giant putting his life on the line to save an ant! Christ's sacrifice on the cross has become a Christian coin phrase...but do we really know what it means? How deeply has that single truth saturated our lives?
I stand at the brink of an unknown future. Nothing really makes sense (in my life, sense is a coveted thing!) Everything I thought to be important has tarnished over time, and I am left with a gaping hole of lost purpose. And this is where I have realized that my relationship with God is constructed of mere threads - strung in every direction to try and mask the gap. I love God...I do lots of things for God, but my relationship with God has suffered from a fear of - get this - intimacy! (I can hear some of you chuckling to yourselves...but there you have it! The TRUTH!)
So this is the beginning of my journey to go deeper with God than I ever have before- to really and truly know Him to the fullest of my human capability. I pray that this may be your prayer for your life.