The Exodus

Well...I'm leaving again. Tuck away those mock "surprise" looks and stop rolling those orbs! I will be taking part in a mission's trip to Louisianna for a couple weeks over Christmas with the highschool I've been volunteering at. It all happened rather last minute really (as most things in my life tend to be!) After a week of struggling with my "intended" plans to visit friends in California over the holidays, I had no peace with leaving for whatever reason. After making the dreaded call that I couldn't come, I had no clue to what God was already putting in place.
On that Friday I showed up at the school for our usually day of hanging out with the kids, only to find out the school was enjoying a SNOW DAY...one of the wonders of living in the great white north I guess! We had opportunity to pray with some of the staff, and thru conversation the door opened up to be a part of the mission team going down south and help head up their spiritual ministry team. Talk about amazing...Not soon after I got a couple sucker punches in the two areas I'm always targeted at for a source of discouragement: my car (love ya Casper!) and my finances (I think the government sponsored my money out and are stalling for time!). Talk about timing...
This isn't the first time I've been blindsided by quirky things that seem to cost me a ton of money in the heart of some exciting spiritual thing in my life - it's like clockwork. After God has hooked up some really amazing things in my life, same day or next will bring some kind of punch to try and discourage the focus. But thru it all God is reminding me it isn't about what my circumstances are, but what my reaction to them is. I can choose to praise...or choose to curse. I can choose joy...or choose bitterness. I can choose to suck up the punch...or take a loaded shotgun wherever I go. The point is the choice is mine. The catch is where I'm placing my trust!
Yeah...so I've been learning to trust God first, and especially now that I have the responsibility of leadership on a more spiritual side then ever before. Talk about stretch and grow! I'll admit to feeling totally inadequate for the position...to the point of praying that God would inspire my friend to come along. And for those of you who know me (like my mother) you're probably laughing and thinking - yeah right...she gets along just fine in front of a crowd. But I promise...as soon as I have to talk about spiritual things (the most intimate thing in my life) I stress out and get tongue tied and tremble like crazy. And in that moment of realizing I really didn't have it...God spoke to my heart (as He tends to do) and reminded me of a man named Moses.
God had told Moses to go to Egpyt to set His people free...and Moses went into how he couldn't do it - how he wasn't a speaker (as he's talking to a burning bush!) Anyhow, God's response was key..."Hey Moses...who is it that made the mouth? I'm more than able to give you the words to speak." (see Exodus 4 for the word-for-word)
Anyways...that was enough for me. God has awesome things planned for this trip - and it starts with realizing how little I am and how BIG He is. I don't have to pretend to have it all together - I just need to be real in every step I take. I need to trust in His leading and let Him work through me to reach places I could never have imagined. And when I open my mouth...I need to trust He will fill it with what needs to be said, not my opinion or powerless words that are stumbled through in my own strength.
Glory to God!